It has come to my attention that while there may, and probably are people in the world that have misunderstood events in my life and gotten the wrong impression from me, the only real person who is giving me trouble now for thinking I'm a liar and a slut is Jesse. And to him I have only this to say:

If you were ever able to call yourself my friend you would believe at least within a shadow of a doubt my word over the garbled rumors that have found their way to your ears. The fact is you don't know anything about me. Never have and never will. I'm not at all the person you're making me out to be and I don't deserve to be your emotional punching bag. I've been your bitch for too damn long. I am a person. I demand respect, especially from my friends. You are not my friend. Not anymore. I've tried really hard to keep this going but you've treated me too badly now for me to forgive. You are going to think I'm a liar and a bitch, I no longer care. I know what I am and I hope that those around me know who I am too. I will never understand why you take everything I do so personally, as if I'm out to get you or want to hurt you. That is not true. You have a paranoia problem. Call me what you will, do what you will, but never ever speak to me again. Any ties I had to you as a friend ended the moment you took a low blow at my dignity.


To everyone that has helped clarify things with me or spoken kind words, you have my deepest thanks. Extra props goes out to Jim! Really man... I mean, wow.


For a long time I've wanted a fresh start. I'm not waiting any longer for people to give it to me. I'm taking it.

I don't think I can hang out with any of you again.

For a while, at least.

I don't know why a nameless group of people thinks I'm a huge slut and I'm cheating on Tom. I don't know why people are saying things about me like this. I don't know who I can trust.

And no one wants to hear, or believe anything I have to say.

I've stayed home from work the past two days and done nothing other than lay on the couch and watch massive amounts of CSI Las Vegas and Project Runway.

Bed sores hurt!